This post is probably the most difficult one I’ve written. It’s a decision upon which I have reflected, prayed and wrestled for almost a year. Yet, as time passes, I am increasingly convinced that it’s time to close the door on this blog.
I began this blog in March 2003 as our family left professional ministry and embarked on a journey of theological exploration. This blog has recorded our joys and struggles as we explored a different form of Christian community. It has allowed me to deconstruct and reconstruct my theology and wrestle with my new identity outside of professional ministry. It has marked special events in our family’s life. And recently, it has recorded our family’s journey into the Holy Orthodox Church.
So why am I ending this blog?
There are a several reasons, but I won’t bore you with the details. Ultimately I believe I’m entering a time when my voice needs to be silent. For me, this blog has been a platform to share what I’ve learned and experienced as well as serving as a catalyst for conversations beyond my local relationships. During the past seven years, I have thoroughly enjoyed writing as well as participating in the conversations that various posts have sparked. I am blessed by the number of people who have contacted me to share their stories. I’m always startled by God’s grace and love in the midst of every person’s journey, struggles and joys. I feel like I was blessed with the rare opportunities to witness firsthand the remarkable transformations of faith as people searched for something deeper and more meaningful than their current church experiences.
But it’s now time for me to be quiet. And I had a choice to make. I could have simply stopped writing posts and let this blog fade away. However, as I’ve grown a bit older, I’ve realized that marking significant events has become increasingly important to me.
This blog has been a very n0table part of my life and I would have regretted not marking my decision to end it. This blog has sustained me for the last several years. It has been my journal and sounding board, allowing me to process my wounds, my theology and my journey. There are probably as many unpublished posts as published ones. But the discipline of writing all of them with prayer, reflection and discernment has been an essential part of the overall formative process in my journey. So because this blog has meant so much to me, I need closure.
As I say goodbye to this blog, some thanks are in order. First, I want to thank everyone who participated in our house church community — Mark, Barbara, Dan, Kerri, David, Jennifer, Angela, Gary, Anne, Thomas, Erika, Billy, Carol, Alan, Maribeth, Debbie and all of the kids and friends who been part of our extended family.
I also want to thank Steve for being a great friend and pastor to me through those house church years. And I want to thank David for being such a profound influence in my movement toward Orthodoxy.
While this blog comes to an end, my life-goals remain the same. I simply want to be a good man, husband, father and friend. I want to embody, demonstrate and announce Christ’s life and love to the best of my abilities. I want to incarnate Christ’s presence in a simple, quiet way to the people I love so that they may grow and excel in God’s life. In some small way, I want to follow St Seraphim of Sarov’s words, “Acquire a peaceful spirit, and around you thousands will be saved.”
I want to thank all of you who have taken time to read my posts, leave comments, say prayers for my family, and be a little part of our journey. May God lead you ever further into his life, love and likeness.